That means a lot! It's so good. I'm loving how you're fleshing this out and giving language to the nuance involved (and how that can sometimes get turned against survivors)
This is so powerful!! Thank you for sharing. "Intentional misalignment in explicit and implicit messaging works in a manipulative person’s favor." Shew wee - I appreciate you!
Your clarity and pastoral words are so helpful, Jenai. Thank you for all the work you put into these writings. I’m sure this will be an aid to many, including myself.
So helpful! As an Autistic communication is confusing. I was the perfect victim. I’m thankful for you and grateful to be 1) growing in discernment and 2) listening to my discernment.
There was so much I wanted to say about neurodivergent vs. neurotypical communication, but I had to edit it out for length! If you want to take that idea and run with it for your own substack, please do!
I think there’s so much to say. I think autistic folks are appropriately sensitive to maladaptive forms of communication!
This article was FANTASTIC. And as someone with CPTSD, raised by a malignant covert narcissist, I know this unhealthy, gross, manipulative vibe well and I have absolutely ZERO tolerance for it. And in my last experience with someone like this (who is now an ex-friend), what’s WILD is that in hindsight, I realized my body recognized the behavior before my brain caught on. That behavior can be so covert (for many reasons you eloquently articulated in this piece), that our brains are trying to work it out while our bodies are like, “🚨THIS FEELS LIKE AN EXPERIENCE WE’VE HAD BEFORE!!” I love what you said about discerning is about becoming. (Paraphrased) I’ve learned that for me part of that is learning to trust the wisdom and discernment of my body because she’s usually a few steps ahead of my cognition. Thank you for this piece! It was excellent!
Asking questions to build discernment is such solid advice. I appreciate you taking the time to gracefully call this out because I think it’s becoming increasingly more common.
So well written. Thanks for this incredibly helpful resource.
This is excellent, Jenai. Well done.
Thanks, Aundi! I planned on sending you this one via text before I saw you already commented!
That means a lot! It's so good. I'm loving how you're fleshing this out and giving language to the nuance involved (and how that can sometimes get turned against survivors)
This is so powerful!! Thank you for sharing. "Intentional misalignment in explicit and implicit messaging works in a manipulative person’s favor." Shew wee - I appreciate you!
So good. Thank you for writing this.
Thanks, Tasha!
Dealing with a narcissistic ex and "who gets who" and "where can I be where there won't be a fight" as part of a divorce. Thanx for the reminders
This is soooooo good!!!!
Boundaries are what YOU will do differently not requiring that others change. There is definitely an overuse and manipulation of therapeutic language.
So, so good, Jenai.
Thanks, Allan!
Your clarity and pastoral words are so helpful, Jenai. Thank you for all the work you put into these writings. I’m sure this will be an aid to many, including myself.
Thanks, Jess. I think I found my research/reading/writing niche and I like living here!
So helpful! As an Autistic communication is confusing. I was the perfect victim. I’m thankful for you and grateful to be 1) growing in discernment and 2) listening to my discernment.
There was so much I wanted to say about neurodivergent vs. neurotypical communication, but I had to edit it out for length! If you want to take that idea and run with it for your own substack, please do!
I think there’s so much to say. I think autistic folks are appropriately sensitive to maladaptive forms of communication!
I added Othered to my Read Immediately piles. More comments (count on it) after I read it.
Yes! Please comment. Tell me what you think!
This article was FANTASTIC. And as someone with CPTSD, raised by a malignant covert narcissist, I know this unhealthy, gross, manipulative vibe well and I have absolutely ZERO tolerance for it. And in my last experience with someone like this (who is now an ex-friend), what’s WILD is that in hindsight, I realized my body recognized the behavior before my brain caught on. That behavior can be so covert (for many reasons you eloquently articulated in this piece), that our brains are trying to work it out while our bodies are like, “🚨THIS FEELS LIKE AN EXPERIENCE WE’VE HAD BEFORE!!” I love what you said about discerning is about becoming. (Paraphrased) I’ve learned that for me part of that is learning to trust the wisdom and discernment of my body because she’s usually a few steps ahead of my cognition. Thank you for this piece! It was excellent!
Asking questions to build discernment is such solid advice. I appreciate you taking the time to gracefully call this out because I think it’s becoming increasingly more common.