Becoming a Seminarian
+ a rejected book cover concept for Othered in case your curious 👀
(I wanted to share a brief newsletter on my decision to apply to and enroll in seminary. It’s a weird choice for someone who has been critical of the church, but I also know it is the right choice for me. The worldview I hold also helped me navigate my choice of seminary. Find more below.)
My kids and I started school this week. My eldest hopped on his bus as a 7th grader. My youngest becomes a 5th grader. And I went up to my office to finish some readings for my first seminary classes.
I sat on the decision to apply to grad school or seminary for a few years. After being ousted from my former church, I was eager to learn, but I was also eager (too eager) for a distraction from pain. I almost applied. Was this close 🤏 to applying. But 7 months after I lost my job, my husband Tyler lost his job as a result of the waning pandemic economy. Any and all academic plans? Dashed.
With some time and distance, this year gave birth to the right moment.
Why Seminary?
I had a thoughtful person reach out and ask why I was going to seminary and what I felt I could gain in a seminary education that I couldn’t do on my own. It was a fair question and one I wrestled with for the better part of the last two years.
First, I’m learning and remembering that I need space to embody what I learn with others. While I am a big reader and can easily motivate myself to learn a new topic, I miss dialoguing with people who challenge me. You and I can learn about any topic in a number of ways. Books, YouTube, TikTok. Never has information been so accessible. I can (and will always) read tons of books and sift through information on my own. But I know I’ll learn how to embody the material when I can live it out in community.
I’ve been woefully lacking in intentional community for years. And finding a community willing to wrestle with theological ideas in southeast Texas? It is a minefield.
Second, I can only go so far on my own. And I desire to go farther. I’m curious about what more there is to be delighted in. Frankly, after so much heartache, I WANT to be delighted. I also want to both acknowledge my limits and give myself space to expand. At this point in my healing, I choose to expand by sitting with others who have different perspectives.
Third, and this one is a big one. I shared previously that spiritual abuse is a result of spiritual malformation. Looking at the history of the church, these spiritual malformations have grown over time. It’s like seeing the different layers of sediment when you look at the cross-section of ground. Christian leaders have repeatedly poured concrete on an eroding foundation. When people are hurt, pushed to the margins, or fall off the cliff at the edge, it isn’t as simple as them loving their sin and wanting to jump off the cliff. It’s that many of us are too tired of holding on to places and spaces not made for us. Many of us were (and are) subject to a bad system built on a rocky precipice with no footholds. Bad systems promise goodness but do not make space for the weary to rest.
I joined the Spiritual Formation MA program at Northeastern because I want to help build a better foundation.
For myself.
For my family.
For those I meet.
I want to know more about the history of the church so that I don’t repeat the systems of harm that have broken so many people.
I want to be a part of building spiritual spaces that offer radical welcome. I want to stop the cycle of othering. And after much discernment (which I’m glad to chat about if you’re interested), I decided Northeastern was the place for me.
Thanks for celebrating with me as I shared the news of my first day on Instagram. 🎉
And if you’re curious, my first classes include an interdisciplinary Bible, history, and theology course called Being in the Story and another called Social Justice and Spirituality taught by one of my favorite social media follows, Marlena Graves.
You can follow along with what I’m reading (seminary or otherwise) on Goodreads.
I hope to share more book updates with you soon!
We have a title. We have a book cover. We have a publication date. I’ll hoop and holler when everything is a “go” to share.
Thanks for sticking around.
Want to take a peek at a rejected book cover concept?
Key word. This cover is a REJECT; it will not be the cover for Othered.
I’m uploading it as a time-lapse video so you can see how many times I changed my mind and tried something else. 🫠🤪
Another Fun Thing
Joy Vetterlein invited me to write for her Substack newsletter, After Faith, a few weeks back. I shared a bit of my story and why I still consider myself a Christian, despite not being a part of any local congregation today.
Reading this also gives some background on my “why” for seminary.
Read it here:
Have questions?
Want to know more about seminary? Curious about the questions I asked myself as I made my seminary decision? Want to know how I’m attempting to juggle all the things as a writer, wife, mom, student, etc? Want to know why I landed on Northeastern on not on other institutions?
Or do you want to know more about why I make it a habit to do artistic things?
Want to know more about Othered?
I’d LOVE to hear your questions! Take advantage of the comment feature here on Substack and send them my way.
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You can find past posts from OTHERED (formerly Letters for the Wilderness) by visiting jenaiauman.substack.com.
Thank you for sharing. There is so much to be learned. I wish you all the best while navigating through seminary. May you find new revelations to share. 💕
This right here. I feel and understand ALL of this:
It’s that many of us are too tired of holding on to places and spaces not made for us.